METAWORRY

It's a word! Oh my god! I knew this education would come in handy. Not only am I discovering all of the things that are wrong with me, there are words for them! Metaworry, "worrying about your own worry."
I also discovered I have trichotillomania: Compulsive hair pulling, related to obsessive compulsive disorder.
Unfortunately, none of these things seems to be serious enough to justify me staying home and not doing anything. I don't seem to be really mentally ill. Just a little weird. I have mild versions of almost all of the mental disorders we are studying so far. Why, oh why, can't I be seriously mentally ill? It would make things so much easier. They'd just stick me in a hospital and drug me up. Then I wouldn't have to worry about finding a job, getting my work done, training for a marathon, what wrong thing I said to someone today that they might be mad at me for, what I'm going to eat for dinner, etc. etc. And I wouldn't have metaworry because I'd be too sick to worry about why I'm worrying so much. Truly, it would be a relief.
Oh, and then there's the brain tumor that I'm sure is festering and causing me to lose my memory. We haven't gotten to the really serious mental illnesses yet, like schizophrenia and psychosis, but I can't wait to see what I learn about myself when we study those.
School is worth it after all.